Andy Lyman/The Paper.
Baseball, despite being known as America’s pastime, isn’t for everyone. But anyone who’s ever been to a game in person, including those who sarcastically refer to it as “sports ball,” can probably admit there’s more fun to be had than who’s on first.
I happen to fall somewhere in the middle of the spectrum between superfandom and conscientious objector. I grew up tagging along to Albuquerque Dukes games with my uncle and cousins, who still know what seems like an encyclopedia worth about players, their stats and well, who’s on first.
To be clear I do enjoy watching just about any sport in person, but I’ve also been known to indulge in all the food and drink even a minor league game has to offer. When I was a kid watching the Dukes play, the game day snacks available to me didn’t usually go beyond sunflower seeds and maybe some food from home shoved into a cooler. These days the Isotopes, the Dukes’ descendants, unleash new culinary creations each year that would likely make Guy Fieri call off his Flavortown odyssey. It seems the folks in the front office are always trying to outdo themselves from the year before. Luckily, I finally got a chance to get a sneak bite of what new offerings the fried food mongers will be slinging this year. Between the pinky-in-the-air vegetarian rice bowl and the gargantuan, saucy turkey leg being served up, there’s a good chance even the most tepid sports fans will find something to pass the time during games—albeit with the help of lots of napkins.
During a media unveiling event, Isotopes Executive Chef John Griego said he had no intention of making things anything but messy.
“If you’re not in the bathroom washing your hands after one of these, then I didn’t do my job,” Griego told reporters.
Vegetarian Fusion Bowl (Available at Noodle Cart near section 108)
I generally like to stick with the easiest available options (see: peanuts and Cracker Jack) when it comes to stadium food, mostly because I hate trying to balance the literal weight of a ball game feast on the way back to my seat. But the addition of the vegetarian fusion bowl this year might have me reconsidering. The fluffy, yet slightly sticky rice offers a solid base for the flavor-packed plant-based pork that’s cooked in hoisin, ginger and soy sauce. While big, messy dishes at a baseball game generally don’t call my name, I could see myself saddling up to one of these bowls topped with both fresh and pickled veggies.
Hawaiian Barbecue Turkey Leg (Available at Santa Fe Trail near section 116)
While I can be a real baby when it comes to messy, hands-on food, I have to appreciate Griego’s blatant disregard for keeping shirts and faces stain-free. His island-inspired turkey leg is not only the size of a small child, but it’s literally dripping with a sweet and tangy sauce, sure to leave its mark—everywhere. Since I’m shameless enough to rock a beard in public, I’m also quick to dismiss eating most sauced-up dishes in public. For anyone else in my position, I say live a little and just keep those sauce-drenched fingers crossed that you don’t end up on the big screen.
El Fuego (Available at Santa Fe Trail near section 116)
True to its name, the El Fuego—let’s call it a sandwich—packs a spicy and smoky punch. This monster of a dish has layers, both literally and flavor-wise. Beef brisket, cooked in a vinegar-heavy Brazilian barbecue sauce, is topped with green chile macaroni and cheese and held together with a green chile and cheese bagel. Again, not for the modest, nor the bearded eater who has reservations about snagging a stack of napkins between innings. All of those ingredients smooshed together almost seem illogical, but they surprisingly work well.
Piggy Burger (Available at Batter’s Up near section 108)
Throwing back to last year’s creations, Griego took his popular Cowboy Candy (think chicharones drenched in maple syrup) and tweaked it for this year’s Piggy Burger. It’s a traditional burger topped with deep-fried, smoked pork burnt ends that are then candied with maple syrup and brown sugar. While the burger itself is great, it, along with the bun, ultimately become a delivery method for the smoke-laden sticky hunks of meat.
Thundercup Sundaes (Available at Banana’s Foster near section 101)
Rounding the last bases is a great adult desert for those who just can’t stomach a beer, even at a baseball game. The Thundercup Sundaes come in a variety of flavors, but here’s a protip: Try the Maple Bacon Whiskey flavor as a base. There’s no shortage of toppings for this baby, but the real takeaway is that there’s actual whiskey in there. So, you know, don’t buy one for the kiddos and eat responsibly.
The Isotopes season kicks off on March 29 at 6:30 P.M., against the El Paso Chihuahuas. Find their full schedule here.